I pride myself on looking after my friends and being loyal to them and being there for them but sometimes things don’t quite work out and I’ve decided to have a look at all the people who in my life that I have found it necessary to leave to their own devices.

Examples of failed relationships

# Sometimes you just have to leave people to get a life. The person I’ve known for the last seven years has taken refuge in self-pity and depression. All I can do is to notify him that I am available should he wish to talk. Meanwhile he has been taken off the friend list but who knows may pop back out of the blue

That may sound a bit hard and it is not a permanent thing but maybe there are some states of mind that a person has to go through on their own so I basically leave them to it. I have learnt that chasing people who do not respond is a very draining and actually an unwise thing to do

# there was a very dear person in South Africa  that I went to see from time to time. She had a wonderful welcoming manner but unfortunately the same did not apply to her husband and although I would like to see her again, I cannot cope with the negativity of the husband so it’s very much mixed blessing and I want to avoid being Piggy in the Middle.

#  I’m drawn towards productive people and here in my locality is a person that worked in the film business, who keeps on saying that he’s going to do this and that, and even take any job that comes up. Presently he has no money and is too proud to sign up for unemployment to which is entitled. Every time I meet him, he says the same thing, that he’s going to do something but he never does. He is sponging off his dad. Reason for leaving him is therefore boredom.

# Another person who lives in Germany and with whom I used to be quite good friends; we met at the same time as I met my partner. When I wrote to her last time she had obviously changed wavelength because she didn’t really want to communicate  beyond the basic pleasantaries and it wasn’t even that pleasant so I got a feeling of ‘no, I’m not wanted in the life of this person’ so fair enough. Who knows what is happening to them.

# Another lady that we both knew and loved made the inconvenient decision to die prematurely so I suppose that’s another reason for the end of the friendship, one that could have turned into a very rich friendship, but we never got the chance. We look forward to meeting her when we ascend to the heavenly realms or wherever it is you go. I hope my ex friends and old friends will come and find me. I’m not quite sure how it works up there but I’m sure it’s very well organized.

# Another person with whom I was friends for some years I have discarded because once I said something that they disagreed with and they really mocked me and belittled me ‘for a joke’ and that was a side of their nature that I was not  aware of so once my caution signals start to blink I do not risk the chance of further communication and the hurt that it might produce.

# Another person who could have been a friend, I found has very strict religious views and when challenged he refused to depart from them. Flexibility and meeting people halfway is what I need with any friendship casual or otherwise so I gently backed off without of course saying anything more

# I know that many people have split from each other because of disagreement about covid. One person has vaccinated whilst the partner or friend has remained free of vaccination.  This situation puts the participants in a very difficult position especially where intimacy is concerned. I wonder how many marriages have fallen apart because of this covid event not to mention the disturbing effects of lock down.

# That was another rather sad case where someone I have known for 40 years considered that my activities were tantamount to working for the evil side and this without any explanation but just an ex-Cathedra statement so although I had enjoyed many years companionship with the person I’m afraid when they say things like this, their time is up.

# others just plain and simple fizzle out. Perhaps we have finished what we needed to say and do, we have learnt from each other, and now it’s time to move on. It’s not a question of having an argument or incompatibility as such,  just that life moves on and providing the departed person is replaced by someone else who does more accurately respect and resonate with your views and opinions then nothing is lost.

# I’m not sure whether to classify holiday relationships or flings or pleasant chatting when we are at a resort and we strike up a relationship with someone. We could call it a contextual friendship.  I don’t think this can be classified as a friend in the full sense of the word because it’s based on the parties having to get on well together for a fixed short period of time but also possibly having something in common.

I have observed that holiday meetings are more often fleeting than not, partly because we tend only to see one side of someone on a holiday when we’re all on our best behaviour as we have to get on with each other, being in the same hotel and so on.

I think Brits are very good at making the best of things.

My general attitude – wavelength is all

I guess what I’m saying is that I’m very possessive about my territory without being territorial. This may seem a contradiction but it arises out duty of care for myself and also duty of care for others. In the whole realm of red pilling –  in other words seeing the world as it is presented versus the world as it is in reality – as in the film The Matrix.

I feel much more comfortable with people who are rebels against the mainstream filth, lies and deception and I cannot call it by any other name.

I think you when you see through the humdrum affairs of life and act accordingly you probably lose about five friends but you also gain one, and that friend makes up for the loss of the others,  and anyway was it a loss?

If I have nothing in common with people deep down and what is there to lose?

I can count the people I call friends on the fingers of one hand but they more than occupy my spare time and energy, and it is good to know that you can ‘phone a friend’ if you have an up and down event.